She will be loved
Sunday, Jun. 20, 2004
weigh-in
I just got off the phone with my family. They were at my sister's house, having the usual father's day chinese takeout dinner. It caused a surprising wave of loneliness to wash over me. Not that father's day is that important or anything, I'm just so alone here and that really hit me just now.All right, tears are gone and I'm ready to bury that along with the rest of my emotions. I'm just so good at coping. (yeah right)
Anyway, no weight loss to report. Standing firm at 220, my body just loves that number. I know I have to change things around, obviously I'm doing something wrong. I have a couple of options:
- Go back to SBD phase 1. Cut out the Kashi GoLean, couscous, and Wasa fiber rye. The Wasa and couscous wouldn't be that hard, but damn I love my Kashi (I'm eating some right now, actually). But economically I'll be forced to stop eating it soon anyway. To budget myself the only groceries I'm allowing myself to buy until I go home in mid-July are milk, eggs, ground beef, frozen veggies, canned tomatoes, beans, celery, green onions, and maybe mayo. I have so much stuff stockpiled (tuna, beans, sauces, cheese, soda), though, that my grocery freeze shouldn't be that much of a hardship. This'll force me to use all the stuff that I always buy but never cook.
- Start counting calories. That'll suck. I'm not scared of what it will reveal or anything, I just have no idea how to calculate everything. Especially since I make everything at home. I don't want to have to measure everything!
- Increase the walk exercises. This is what I'll start with. I don't know if it's just coincidence, but since I've switched my exercise focus to pilates and weights, my weight has stalled. So I'm going to get in more walks this week and see if it makes a difference next week. I'm going to walk at least 10 miles this week and see what it does.
No goals for this week (I'm not going to call the 10 miles a goal, it is what I WILL DO), I haven't been keeping them, so why add to my frustration with myself?
Watching/Hearing/Listening to: E! - Elizabeth Hurley True Hollywood Story
Drinking: water
Wearing: pink exercise pants, light gray tank, white socks, blue suede shoes